Feelings and such...

One thing about this disease that constantly amazes me is how it affects every single part of my body.  The 'physical' parts as in the body pains are easy to understand but the way it affects my emotional state is just wierd and hard to get a grasp on.  For someone who has never expierienced this craziness would think I was insane if I tried to really explain how I feel from day to day.  There are days I literally feel drunk, like I've had one too many.  Off balance, in a 'haze', everything seems good to go no matter what happens.  The next day, I am ill at the world, for no reason at all.  I have to tell myself to 'be nice' all day long because if I don't, I'd be yelling at everyone all day long.  Then, there are days where I just want to cry all day long.  It's like being depressed, yet you are not really and you know you aren't..you are well aware that the disease is causing this chaos.  Then, the next day..you feel normal emotionally.  It is the wildest roller coaster ride one can imagine.  How can cortisol cause so much damage??  Crazy...