So, the MRI and CT scan showed 'normal.' I knew it was a dinstinct possibilty as most everything I've read is the small pit tumors don't show on normal MRI's, especially without contrast. It was still so hard to hear as I was so hoping to keep moving forward. The sucky part was after she (the endo's PA) told me this, she went on to say that the last labs I had done (the fasting labs and dex suppression test) were messed up by the lab and so I needed to have those repeated this week. Nice. I go back tomorrow and the next day to have all that re-done and then back to the Endo next Tuesday for those results and to discuss next steps. The worst part of the appointment is that the assistant who was giving me all this information is so uninformed on my disease. She knows very 'basic' information on the disease and kept saying things like, "when we get these medicines straight, you will start to feel better." Ummm..no lady. Cushing's does not work like that. Until this tumor is gone, I will not feel better. All the vitamin D and blood pressure medication in the world is not gonna work any magic on my body--these are all symptoms of my disease. The sad thing is she knows she doesn't know much. She told me after this appointment, I would only see the Endo and not her since she was just a 'middle man.' I was like, Thank the Lord....
In my research, I know I need to have a more detailed MRI done so that is what we'll be talking about next week with my endo doc. I honestly don't know if my town has the MRI machine I need. If my endo doesn't know or he isn't willing to act quickly, then I am going to dump him and move on to the clinic in Atlanta. This is where I'd have surgery anyways and since the office is only 1.5 hours away, there is really no reason not to. I called today and no referral is needed--that was good news.
The thing is..deep down, I still have the peace and faith that God has me in His hands and that all is His time and not mine. This is a life lesson I learned through my son's illness. But today, I've had a nice little pity party and have really struggled with why things never seem easy for me. As the day progresses, I am feeling better, have stopped crying and I think I am ready to get back up and fight again. Dusting off...
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Wow. That was such an amazing story. I just recently saw my doc for my high blood pressure. And. While I was there he gave me a physical. When he saw my stretch marks, he asked me how long I had them for. I told him since maybe 2010. And while I may be overweight at the moment, I did loose weight about a . Ago. And I still had those marks. I just thought I had them from the weight gain. But he said he dident think so. Because they don't look like weight gain marks. He said they look like a sign of Cushings Disease. He then referred me to the. Endocrine doc for confirmation. I see her this Wednesday at 8:30 in the morning. But I looked up all the signs and symptoms and it was a huge shock to find out that I not only fit one, not only two, but mostly all of the symptoms. That was such a shock. Right then and there was when I was convinced that I have it. Then I read about how rare it is. And that it is mostly caused by a tumor in either the pituitary gland or the adrenal gland. But I'm sure its in the pituitary. Because of two facts. The first being my seizures. I've had them all of my life. I an now 23. Second, my vision is not as good anymore. I have lazy eye and Strabismis. Sorry I think I spelled that wrong lol. Anyways, I sometimes get this weird feeling in my head and eyes. And its like a dizzy feeling without the dizziness. Its hard to explain. But the thing that scares me the most is the fact that I may have had this my whole life. I mean when I read that this disease can affect your mental state, it all made sense. All my life, everyone thought I had some sort of mental illness. Like ADHD or Autism or Aspergers Syndrome. Because I fit all of the signs and symptoms. But to think, that my whole life could have been different if the docs had only considered this disease as a possibility. And now the thing I'm most worried about is how my mother, grandmother will take the results of the test. And atm I currently spend my time taking care of my 89 year old. Uncle. I do everything for him. My fear is who will be there to take care of him while I undergo surgery. Or if necessary chemotherapy? Cause as much as I want to, I won't be able to do it. And that scares the hell out of me. To not be able to take care of myself. Anyways, I will keep u updated.
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