Rough night

I've said it before but it amazes me how many different parts of your body this disease affects.  The part that continues to amaze me the most is how it affects your mind.  And to think, the 'monster' that caused all this havoc is gone, it's aftermath is still as mean.  This healing process is long and it helps that I've seen glimpses of light at the end of this tunnel, some days are still so hard.  Last night was brutal.  I had to pee a gazillion times.  Not the same type of 'have to pee' as before surgery but it is obvious the damage it has done to my bladder.  If I only have to pee a 'little', I still get the urge.  And back to the 'mind' part..had crazy dreams about the disease...they seemed so real and were really too insane to even type about.  I usually never have nightmares and these were just that.  I've been home so much although I did get out a good bit last week and my mind is starting to just go a bit, I think.  My body is just so tired, so incredibly tired.  It's like the more rest I get, the more tired I am.  I am sure this post is just all over the place but that is where I am right now..all over the place.